Wednesday, March 9, 2011

Twelve Days

Hi guys. I guess you’ve probably noticed my absence from the website recently. Well, I’ve finally felt good enough to post something. So here goes. I’ve been in the hospital for the last twelve days and I’m still not sure when I will get out. Hopefully soon. Hopefully. I’m definitely ready.

Unfortunately, I was pretty sick when I arrived. I started out with an infection that made its way into my transplanted kidney and then into my bloodstream. Not good. Not fun.

But what makes matters much more difficult is that for more than a year now, my transplanted kidney has not been doing it’s best. I chose not to tell anyone because I wanted to focus on being positive, but I’ve slowly had to come to terms that my kidney, the wonderful gift of life given to me more than eighteen years ago will not be with me forever. Actually, something I never really expected to happen. But I was so young when I received it and it has done so superbly over the years, I never had a reason to question its lifespan. I’ve learned recently however, that 18 years is fantastic for a transplanted kidney and even better since mine was from a deceased donor. I can’t tell you how hard it is to accept that I will have to let this kidney go. Feelings of letting my deceased donor down fill my heart with sadness.

But it is happening. And faster than I anticipated. Before getting sick two weeks ago, I had begun the process to be re-evaluated for another kidney transplant and to be added to the transplant waiting list. In the meantime, my mom is being tested to be a possible donor. I had thought I would have time to do all of this and hopefully have surgery and not skip a beat with my job or with this website that I enjoy sharing with you so much.

No such luck. Since I’ve been here, I’ve started dialysis to take some stress off my distressed kidney while it tries to heal. The hope is that I would be on dialysis for a short while, giving my transplanted kidney time to recuperate. Then, go off dialysis and try to squeak a few more months out before surgery is needed.

The alternative, though which is just as possible is that 1) I’ll be on dialysis until my mom is confirmed as a donor or 2) My mom is not a potential donor and then I would stay on dialysis while I wait on the list for a kidney to become available.

So that’s what’s been going on. That’s the reason for the lack of cake pops and cupcakes and cute. I just wanted to let you know something and thank everyone for their wonderful and inspiring get well wishes. You guys are a huge bright spot in my life. You have no idea how much.

Hugs,
Bakerella

1
maria said...

our thoughts and prayers are with you, wishing you a quick recovery

March 9, 2011 05:45 PM
2
angel said...

first comments !!!!

March 9, 2011 05:46 PM
3
Michelle said...

Thinking of you and hoping for a great outcome very soon!

March 9, 2011 05:47 PM
4
Kate said...

I’ve never commented before, but have been reading for a looonggg time. Please know that you’re in my thoughts! I’m looking forward to the day you’re back to normal!

March 9, 2011 05:47 PM
5
Karly said...

Oh, I’m so sorry to hear this! Hang in there…big prayers coming your way!

March 9, 2011 05:47 PM
6
Penelope said...

I’m so sorry, Bakerella! Best wishes for a fast recovery!

March 9, 2011 05:48 PM
7
Tanja said...

:(
Good luck!

March 9, 2011 05:48 PM
8
Tonya Lynn said...

My thoughts and prayers are with you (and your Mom) (and the rest of your family for that matter.)

March 9, 2011 05:48 PM
9
jessielou said...

Hugs!
I am so sorry to hear you haven’t been feeling well and don’t worry about posting until you are better!
I hope you feel better soon and things work out :)
xoxo

March 9, 2011 05:48 PM
10
Beth said...

Oh goodness! Praying for you!!

March 9, 2011 05:48 PM
11
K said...

Keeping my fingers crossed for you! It will all be better! You’ll see! Just be positive and brave!

March 9, 2011 05:48 PM
12
Heather Wilson said...

Please, please, PLEASE rest!!! Take your time to get better! Dont worry about us, we’ll still be here when you get back!!

March 9, 2011 05:48 PM
13
Maressa said...

All the best for a speedy and happy resolution, know that you are missed here and that you are in our thoughts!

March 9, 2011 05:49 PM
14
Julie said...

For all of the happiness and sweetness you have brought into my life through your book and website my thoughts and prayers are with you. Get well soon!

March 9, 2011 05:49 PM
15
Mindy said...

Praying for you!

March 9, 2011 05:49 PM
16
karen said...

Oooooh! I’m thinking about you … I’m fairly new to your blog … and I … LOVE IT! I have been thinking about your cakepops since I first heard about them sometime last year and think I shall make a special effort to make some this month as a kind of “solidarity” thing. That way I will be thinking about you the whole time!

Anyway, here’s to your kidney healing enough to carry you through the next little while, until things are sorted out.

March 9, 2011 05:49 PM
17
Shylah said...

You’re in my thoughts, and so is your mom. I’ll be sending lots of perfect-match juju your way. <3

March 9, 2011 05:49 PM
18
Jessica said...

Prays for you and your family! <3

March 9, 2011 05:49 PM
19
Gabriela said...

Keeping you in my heart and prayers. You are very important to a lot of us and as such, hope with amy might that you are on the mend soon.

March 9, 2011 05:50 PM
20
Felicity Lingle said...

I’m so sorry you’re going through this. You sound like a strong woman, I hope you get well soon! ((hugs))

March 9, 2011 05:50 PM
21
Allison said...

so sorry to hear :( i knew something must have been wrong with no updates for so long! i’ll be including you in my prayers.

March 9, 2011 05:50 PM
22
Jess said...

I’m so sorry to hear this, but i’m glad you shared your story. You’ll be in my thoughts and prayers. I love your blog, but your health comes first. *huge hug*

March 9, 2011 05:51 PM
23
S-L said...

Thinking and praying for you and your family!

March 9, 2011 05:51 PM
24
Lilie said...

OH MY Goodness! Wishing you all the best for a new kidney!!

March 9, 2011 05:51 PM
25
Cassykins said...

Oh sweetie pea, I’m so sorry. Rest up and get yourself better. A break now is much better than if you get even more sick later.

March 9, 2011 05:51 PM
26
Brandy said...

I’ve missed u! I check ur site everyday to see what I’ll be making that weekend :). I will be thinking of u and hope ur better soon hospital stays like that are not a good time at all! I wish u luck get better!

March 9, 2011 05:52 PM
27
Missy said...

I noticed the absence, and hoped that everything was okay. My prayers will be with you. You are such a bright spot in the blogging community.

March 9, 2011 05:52 PM
28
jess @ fushmush said...

My thoughts are with you too. I hope a new kidney comes your way very quickly. I really miss your blog postings. You’re such an inspiration.

March 9, 2011 05:52 PM
29
Chrissie M said...

Will be praying for you and your family.

March 9, 2011 05:52 PM
30
britt said...

sending a prayer and good vibes your way…

March 9, 2011 05:52 PM
31
Pie said...

You are in my prayers Bakerella! You are such I bright spot in this world, I hope everything turns out well for you. Thanks for all the sweet inspiration :)

March 9, 2011 05:52 PM
32
Michelle said...

As much as I love all things Bakerella, the most important thing is that Miss Bakerella is in the best health possible. Will be sending you prayers, love and strength so that it all works out in the best possible scenario for you. Get well soon!

March 9, 2011 05:52 PM
33
Melissa said...

So sorry to hear about your kidney troubles! I will be praying for you as will a lot more people I’m sure! You are greatly loved and appreciated! Hope you start feeling better soon!

March 9, 2011 05:52 PM
34
Shannon said...

Oh, I was just thinking of you this morning when I saw that Starbucks has cake pops on the menu. I thought that was just the most crazy wonderful thing! Anyways, I will be praying for you for sure!! (((hugs)))

March 9, 2011 05:52 PM
35
Rita said...

Dear Bakerella, please know you are in my thoughts and prayers. Take care of yourself and rest.

March 9, 2011 05:52 PM
36
Kate said...

You are in our thoughts and prayers. I hope everything works out, and you’re on the road to recovery soon!!

March 9, 2011 05:52 PM
37
Sarah said...

Bakerella, thoughts with you. Hope you hear good news asap.

March 9, 2011 05:53 PM
38
Stela Oliveira said...

Hi, I have Bakerella in my reader and today I notice we’ve been gone for a while. Hope you get well soon! I’m sending very nice vibrations from Brazil!!!

March 9, 2011 05:53 PM
39
Southern Gal said...

Praying for you. That your mom will be a match and that your transplanted kidney will hold out for you for a while longer.

March 9, 2011 05:53 PM
40
AJ said...

Long time reader, first time commenter. Wishing you all the best for a speedy recovery. I hope the new transplant goes smoothly. Sending good vibes to you from Australia :)

March 9, 2011 05:53 PM
41
kitty said...

this brought tears to my eyes. good luck, stay strong, and here’s hoping your mom is a match!

March 9, 2011 05:54 PM
42
Amanda B. said...

Best wishes for a speedy transplant! My mom had a kidney transplant 5 years ago, so I understand the nervous waiting game and three days a week dialysis. I hope your mom is a match and you won’t have to stay on dialysis very long.

March 9, 2011 05:54 PM
43
Jackie said...

I am so very sorry to hear this – I hoped you were just busy signing books :-(. My good thoughts and wishes are coming your way and I hope everything works out well for you. You take good care of yourself and we will all be right here when you are feeling better. **hugs**

March 9, 2011 05:54 PM
44
Kim said...

Thanks for sharing something so personal with us. I will definitely be praying for you!

March 9, 2011 05:54 PM
45
Suzanne G. said...

I will be praying for you and your new kidney! Keep your beautiful smile shining!

March 9, 2011 05:55 PM
46
MNStacey said...

Love and prayers for a quick recovery!

March 9, 2011 05:55 PM
47
Brittany said...

So sorry to hear about your illness. Thinking of you and your family, and best wishes for your recovery. Feel better Bakerella!

March 9, 2011 05:56 PM
48
Suzy said...

I’m not one to post on blogs, I’m usually a lurker, but you’ve always seemed like such a genuinely good person. I really hope this all goes quickly and smoothly. I wish you and your mom lots and lots of luck.

March 9, 2011 05:56 PM
49
BlessedBlogger said...

I spent three weeks in the hospital last year after becoming septic from an intestinal puncture so I feel your pain. I’m so sorry you’re going through this and wanted to let you know that you’re in our prayers and thoughts.

March 9, 2011 05:56 PM
50
Erlyn said...

My thoughts and prayers are with you!

March 9, 2011 05:56 PM
51
Tammy said...

So sorry to hear of your troubles. You have also been a bright spot for me as well. I love checking your website and finding the creative and adorable sweets you come up with. I love making them and my children are always so excited to see new ‘yummies!’ Best wishes to you and I will keep you in my prayers.

March 9, 2011 05:57 PM
52
rachele said...

Praying that you will have a speedy recovery & a new kidney soon. Take care of yourself!

((Hugs))

March 9, 2011 05:57 PM
53
Michelle said...

Thinking of you and keeping you in my thoughts and prayers!

March 9, 2011 05:58 PM
54
Jessica said...

Thanks for the update, we’re all rooting for you and we know you’ll pull through!

March 9, 2011 05:58 PM
55
Hanna said...

I’v never commented here before, but I love your site and your super cute cake tops :) Best wishes for a quick recovery!

March 9, 2011 05:58 PM
56
SweetCreationsbyStephanie.com said...

Praying that your mom is a match & you can have another sucessful kidney transplant.

March 9, 2011 05:59 PM
57
Nichole said...

My stars! I’ll be praying for you.

March 9, 2011 05:59 PM
58
suguna vinodh said...

i am sure u will be alrite. prayers and god bless u. take it easy during the treatment.

March 9, 2011 05:59 PM
59
RGage said...

Been reading for a while and never seriously commented, but I sure hope that you get better soon and that everything works out expeditiously. I hope your mom is a match. Take care of yourself. Best wishes and thoughts!

March 9, 2011 05:59 PM
60
Sharmila said...

Long time reader, first time commenter. Just wanted to say that I am sorry to read of your health troubles, and hope you have a swift recovery. Also, I hope you know that you have so many people out here who appreciate you for brightening our days and who hope for nothing but the best for you.

March 9, 2011 06:00 PM
61
Jan said...

Thoughts and prayers are with you! Hope you have a quick recovery.

March 9, 2011 06:00 PM
62
Elaine said...

You’re in my thoughts. I love your blog–I check it every morning. I wish you the best!

March 9, 2011 06:00 PM
63
Theresa said...

So sorry you are going through this :( My thoughts and prayers are also with you and your family during this difficult time.

March 9, 2011 06:00 PM
64
Kathy C. said...

Happy thoughts & prayers for a positive match! Thank you for letting us know what’s going on so we can send you all the positive vibes we can for you!!!! :)

March 9, 2011 06:00 PM
65
Alexandra Hall said...

I’m so sorry, Bakerella! I hope everything works out and you feel better soon!

March 9, 2011 06:01 PM
66
SillySuzanne said...

Sending lots of positive thoughts your way!

March 9, 2011 06:01 PM
67
lindsay said...

oh bakerella :( I hope you find a donor soon and feel better! all of your blog followers and fans are sending you get better wishes for a quick and easy recovery.

March 9, 2011 06:02 PM
68
Steph said...

Hugs to you sweetie!!
I hope everything works out soon too, and that you can be back to doing what you love!

March 9, 2011 06:02 PM
69
Tena said...

Love and prayers to you, dear Bakerella!

March 9, 2011 06:02 PM
70
Colleen said...

Sending prayers and (virtual) hugs your way!

March 9, 2011 06:03 PM
71
Stephanie said...

((Hugs)) Sending up prayers for you!

March 9, 2011 06:03 PM
72
Kori said...

Oh my goodness! I’m heartbroken! I have an extra kidney!!!!!!!!!!!! :) I will be praying for you, that the Lord comforts you, that He gives you His peace and patience, and that the perfect kidney comes knocking on your door.

Kidney shaped cake pops next???

March 9, 2011 06:03 PM
73
Wedgie said...

My goodness, I’ve only just discovered your wonderful website and the delicious looking treats you create, but I’m already hooked. I am so sorry to hear your news and I hope everything works out quickly for you – hospital is not a fab place to be!

March 9, 2011 06:03 PM
74
Liz said...

You are in my thoughts… best wishes!

March 9, 2011 06:03 PM
75
Amy said...

Your absence has been felt, and I only wish my original thought that you were off building your business was true.
Sorry you have to go through all of this and I’m hoping you have a quick recovery.

March 9, 2011 06:04 PM
76
Marci said...

I noticed your absence. I wish it was for something exciting. Hope all goes well & that you’ll feel like your wonderful self again soon. My thoughts are with you & your Mom.

March 9, 2011 06:05 PM
77
Jessica said...

Bakerella we love you! Get better soon!

March 9, 2011 06:05 PM
78
Jenn said...

So sorry to hear this, but I hope everything turns out well for all involved! Get well soon!

March 9, 2011 06:06 PM
79
Judy said...

prayers are with you and your family and here’s to good luck and a positive results!

March 9, 2011 06:06 PM
80
Nicole said...

wishing you all the best xoxo

March 9, 2011 06:06 PM
81
bink & boo said...

Oh bakerella… My heart is so heavy to hear this news, but I have so much hope for you (and your family) and I will be praying for peace and comfort throughout your whole body and mind, and that you your mother will either be a match or you will find a donor asap.

Wishing you sunshine and cheer.
Bianca

March 9, 2011 06:07 PM
82
Lacey said...

Praying for you, Bakerella!

March 9, 2011 06:08 PM
83
jen said...

Get Well soon! We all miss you and hope you are able to find a donor.

March 9, 2011 06:08 PM
84
amy said...

you are in my thoughts and prayers – wishing you a speedy recovery! ;)

March 9, 2011 06:08 PM
85
becca said...

I’m so sorry to hear about your hospitalization/kidney issues! Thoughts, hugs and prayers to you… don’t worry about us; get better soon!

March 9, 2011 06:08 PM
86
Steph said...

Everyday I look to see if you have posted something new becuase it is so neat to see how talented and gifted you truly are. I wish you all the best. Life really is a blessing, I know everything will work out for you.
God Bless You!

March 9, 2011 06:08 PM
87
Jen said...

I’m so glad to hear from you! I was very worried. You are in my thoughts and I wish you the speediest of recoveries! I guess my cupcake calendar will have to do for now!

March 9, 2011 06:09 PM
88
Monica (MsHobby) said...

I hope you feel better soon, and I hope your mom is able to be a match. Best wishes during this difficult process!

March 9, 2011 06:09 PM
89
Rose said...

Wishing you the best outcome. I hope your new kidney will be with you soon.

March 9, 2011 06:09 PM
90
Caitlin said...

I’m another faithful reader who’s never commented before. Just wanted to say we’re all thinking of you and hoping you the quickest and best recovery possible. Go little kidney go!

March 9, 2011 06:09 PM
91
Fallon said...

Stay strong Bakerella!!! I’ll be praying for you to get a new kidney asap. In the mean time I’ll eat cake in your honor ;)

March 9, 2011 06:09 PM
92
marilyn said...

Thoughts and prayers are with you!
We miss you!!

March 9, 2011 06:09 PM
93
Morgan said...

I have an extra kidney. I’m not sure what the process is, but I’m happy to offer one up if you need it. Email me :)

March 9, 2011 06:10 PM
94
Ellen said...

Oh my. Cake pops can wait. Get better soon!

March 9, 2011 06:10 PM
95
cynthia said...

I have missed you. Thank you for sharing your story, you are an inspiration to me. I hope everything works out foe the best

March 9, 2011 06:10 PM
96
Georganne said...

I just wanted to add my love and support to all the previous comments. I wish you luck through the scary realities that face you. I wish we could help somehow.

March 9, 2011 06:10 PM
97
Chris said...

Prayers to you and your family!

March 9, 2011 06:10 PM
98
Kerie said...

Here’s to a positive match, a successful op and for you and your mom to be back on your feet in no time. My friend here in ATL is going through some drastic kidney surgery next week. Her transplant failed due to antibody build ups and she has been on peritoneal dialysis for 7 years – there are so many ups and downs and struggles for you renal patients. My heart and best wishes go out to you. You have great spirit and sense of fight and you’re so very much loved (even by your virtual friends) xx

March 9, 2011 06:10 PM
99
janie said...

Wishing you all the very best Bakerella. You are an amazing person and inspiration to all. I wish you a matching donor with your mom if not someone else fast and a speedy recovery. Thanks for sharing with us all. You are very brave!

March 9, 2011 06:11 PM
100
elle said...

BIG virtual hugs and love being sent your way — i know your amazing spirit will get you through these tough days, we are all here rooting for you!!

March 9, 2011 06:11 PM
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